The Dirty Dozen and Bottom of the Barrel: Cruel to be Kind

Yeah, this is one of our all-time favorites...and it fits this week:



Oh you Nick Lowe....

Yeah, it was a tough week for some: We're talking about you Missouri. Blew a chance to essentially clinch the SEC East by gagging in the 4th quarter vs. South Carolina.

But that's on you. We figured you would at some point. And you did us all a favor by eliminating another undefeated team from the equation, so that's not such a bad thing.



Oh, geez, now we've done it, we've introduced Nic Cage into the equation. Chaos can only follow...

But a look back--Last week: 14-2, back on track, 94-16 for the season. Pretty damn good, eh!



But enough Nic Cage, it's time as Casey Kasem always said...to get "On with the Countdown"

THE DIRTY DOZEN:

1) Florida State 7-0. Yep, we did it. Brother Jon is going to laugh...or cry here, but you can make a case for this being the best team in all the land. There is always the specter of the ACC choke, but we don't think Jameis Winston will allow it. This Week: vs. Miami, Our Pick: FSU 37, Miami 20

2) Oregon 8-0. Winning against easy competition--check. Winning against obnoxious competition---yep. Beating a good UCLA team, yep, check that too. No reason to think anything will change, though we still wonder how they'll hold up against a physical team. Guess we'll find out. This Week: at Stanford. Our Pick: Oregon 41, Stanford 27

3) Alabama 8-0. Sorry, to be king, you have pass a series of tests. And Crimson Tiders, you haven't been tested this year other than vs. Johnny Football. And if he had even a lick of defense, Texas A&M would have beaten you. We'll find out what'cha got next week. This Week: BYE

4) Baylor 7-0. Can we just say that if Texas dumps Mack Brown, Art Briles should be the man to lord over Austin. But then again, why leave Baylor, they're pretty damn good. Admittedly, they resemble Oregon teams of the past few years, but so what? This Week: vs. Oklahoma, Our Pick: Baylor 43. Oklahoma 31

5) Ohio State 8-0. Okay, we admit it. The whitewashing of Penn State was impressive. But it was Penn State, not Alabama, not Oregon nor any other Top 5 team. It's not gonna help you to face Purdue and Illinois the next 2 weeks. This Week: at Purdue. Our Pick: tOSU 48, Purdue 10

6) Stanford 7-1. So your season is now pretty much on the line Cardinal. Still can't figure out how you lost to Utah, but you did. Here's your chance to redeem that. Are you up to the task? This Week: See #2

7) Clemson 7-1. Another disappointing team. We really thought more of these guys. Yeah, sure, they followed up the FSU embarrassment with a win over Maryland, but it wasn't exactly impressive either. This Week: at Virginia, Our Pick: Clemson 43, Virginia 17

8) Miami 7-0. Yeah, sorry, we aren't buying you as returning to your "U" days of lore. You've beaten up on mostly Little Sisters of the Poor and were lucky to escape Wake Forest. Yeah, not impressed. Sorry. This Week: see #1

9) Auburn 7-1. Looks like they are back. You can easily make the argument Gus Malzahn for coach of the year. Especially if the Tigers keep winning. Couple of tests lay ahead though and Nick Marshall is a bit dinged up. That might be a problem. This Week: at Arkansas, Our Pick: Auburn 37, Ark.23

10) Northern Illinois 8-0. Yes, that's right. Best team you've never heard of. And Jordan Lynch is the best college QB you've never heard of. 18 TD passes, 8 TD runs. Beat that? Yeah, didn't think so. This Week: vs. UMass, Our Pick: Northern Illinois 47, UMass 7

11) Missouri 7-1. That was an ugly loss last week and may be the end of the run here. Though James Franklin's possible return could change some things. We'll give you guys another week. Prove you belong. This Week: vs. Tennessee, Our Pick: Missouri 33, Tennessee 21

12) Fresno St 7-0. Yes, that's right. We're take a Mountain West team to round out the dozen. Why not? We don't think Oklahoma is that good, LSU and Texas A&M have lost twice. Not to say they won't return, but we'll give Fresno the love here. This Week: vs. Nevada, Our Pick: Fresno St. 44, Nevada 29

THE BOTTOM OF THE BARREL:



5) Umass 1-7.



Yes, yes you are. Nothing else needs to be said. Prove us wrong. This Week: See #10

4) UConn 1-7. Not sure what the Huskies and UMass say about football in the Northeast, we'll leave that to your imagination. But man, we hope those two teams never play. At least not on TV. This Week: vs. Louisville (ouch), Our Pick: Louisville 53, UConn 10

3) Georgia State 0-8. Sorry guys. Close ain't gonna cut it. You haven't beaten anyone. And we're pretty sure you aren't going to beat anyone left on your schedule.



Truth---This Week: vs. W.Kentucky, Our Pick: WKY 37, Ga.State 21

2) Miami (OH) 0-8. No, the OH, doesn't mean "owe", it means "zero" as in that many wins. You aren't getting out of the basement here guys. Ain't happening. Your top 2 running backs, a combined "zero" TD's. Sensing a trend here. This Week: vs Bowling Green (Nov 5), Our Pick: Bowling Green 37, Miami 0

1) Southern Miss 0-8. It was a nice gesture by the student body to hold a support rally for you. Really, it was. They have to be as confused as we are, didn't this used to be a pretty good, "Mid-Major" program? Really, it couldn't have been that long ago, could it? This Week: at Marshall, Our Pick: Marshall 42, Southern Miss 12

Yes, New Mexico State finally won a game. So they get the week off---our list that is...

Maybe they just wanted some cake---ENJOY!