The Dirty Dozen and Bottom of the Barrel: Turkey's Aren't Rivals Edition

Because of course they can't fly. But rivalry games, they live on forever. And this week, after last weeks overwhelming spate of Cupcake games, we get rivalry week. Where there is actually a lot at stake.



Okay, cupcakes, donuts...we couldn't find a clip of Homer saying cupcakes...

Anyway, so many big games, so much Turkey, so little time.

About last week. Well, we had a pretty good week, but there weren't a lot of tough picks. We called the Arkansas game, but missed on Kansas State/West Virginia.

Eh, it happens. We still went 13-1 for the week, which is pretty good and put us at 126-30 for the season, which is damn good.

But enough about us...it's time as the legendary Casey Kasem says to get "On With the Countdown"...

THE DIRTY DOZEN:

1) Florida State 11-0. Ok, yeah, we know, they've barely won against inferior competition. But they won. And that is the point. Will they win it all--who knows...but there's something to be said for running the table.



And that's the bottom line. Will they beat UF this week. We're tempted to pick an upset this week, but we won't do it here. This Week: vs. Florida, Our Pick: FSU 31, UF 21

2) Alabama 10-1. Last week doesn't count. But it doesn't matter, the Tide have gotten better every week. Do not underestimate them. Ever. Amari Cooper's status may have an impact, just not this week. This Week: vs. Auburn, Our Pick: Bama 47, Auburn 34

3) Oregon 10-1. Okay, the Duckies are West Coast good. But does that translate? We don't think so. Still, aside from the Arizona hiccup, they've been good. But the defense isn't, and that's what will cause them to eventually lose. This Week: at Oregon St.. Our Pick: Oregon 45, Oregon St. 42

4) TCU 10-1. No, we don't know why they struggled with Kansas. But they did. Still, they've been impressive in most other ways. Not their fault there's no Big 12 title game. And yes, we know, they lost to Baylor. This Week: at Texas, Our Pick: TCU 27, Texas 21

5) Mississippi St. 10-1. Yes, they lost to Alabama. But are they REALLY a CFB Playoff team? That is the question. We think if you don't win your conference you should not be eligible. But apparently the committee does not. Oh well. This Week: at Ole Miss, Our Pick: Ole Miss 31, Miss St. 27 UPSET!!!

6) Ohio St. 10-1. The most improved team in CFB. Bar none. And they may jump into the Final 4. Would not surprise us a bit. They may be the most dangerous non-SEC team in it. This Week: vs. Michigan. Our Pick: tOSU 48, Michigan 17

7) Baylor 9-1. Sure, we're the only ones with the Bears ranked this low. So what? Yeah, we still see them as soft. And outside the TCU and Oklahoma games they haven't played anyone. Next week vs. K-State will be telling. But we're not there yet. This Week: at Texas Tech, Our Pick: Baylor 53, T-Tech 21

8) Georgia 9-2. When dialed in, one of the most dangerous teams in CFB. But, since team Brain Fart lived up to their name, they need help if they want to be a spoiler. Love Nick Chubb, because of him, they'll be good for at least 2 more years. This Week: vs. Ga. Tech, Our Pick: UGA 43, Tech 21

9) UCLA 9-2. Finally, they're playing like everyone expected them to at the beginning of the season. Big win last week vs. USC. If they somehow ended up in PAC-12 title game, they'd be a tough out for Oregon. This Week: vs. Stanford, Our Pick: UCLA 28, Stanford 23

10) Kansas St 9-2. Jake Waters picked a good week to have a career game vs. W.Va. 400 yards is a pretty good accomplishment on the road. And yes, the Wildcats still might have a voice in who makes the CFB 4. This Week: BYE

11) Arizona 9-2. Rich Rod has done wonders here. The Wildcats best season in a long, long time. Anu Soloman has been a revelation at QB, leading the team in rushing and passing. He's thrown 25 TD's already this season. This Week: vs. Arizona St. Our Pick: Arizona 37, Az State 31

12) Michigan St. 9-2. The Spartans look great on paper. And have only lost to Oregon and Ohio St. Of course they were the only two tough games they've played too. The Big 10...yeah, not so good. And that hurts these guys. This Week: at Penn St., Our Pick: Mich St. 31, PSU 21

THE BOTTOM OF THE BARREL:



It's been a challenging season for our Bottom 5. The list has changed slightly. We boosted defending champ Miami of Ohio out of the list after two wins, but you could still argue they belong here. If we did a Bottom 10, they definitely would be on that list.

But nobody could stop SMU. The Mustangs truly were unstoppable in their march to the Toilet Bowl. No wins and offensive output that...um, was truly offensive gave them an unbeatable edge.

We should give special mention to Georgia State, winners of 1 game the past two seasons. Guys, you better get your acts together. You may become permanent residents. And we are thinking about naming the trophy after you....

Yes, we know the season is not over, but it would be a shock if any of these teams actually win...

5) New Mexico St. 2-9. What's a bottom poll without a New Mexico team. The Aggies started out with 2 wins and followed that with 9 straight losses. But hey, the season is almost over--so there's that. This Week: at Arkansas St., Our Pick: Ark St. 47, New Mexico St. 21

4) Kent ST. 1-9. You know you are bad when your game gets snowed out, postponed and there's no interest in making it up. The Flashes are one of the worst offenses in the game. And the D isn't much better. Hopefully there's no snow in Ohio this week. This Week: vs. Akron, Our Pick: Akron 21, Kent St. 10

3) Idaho 1-9. Yes, they beat NM State. But they've not beaten anyone else. To their credit, they've been competitive. Sort of. It doesn't make up for the record. And they play in the Snowy Appalachian Mountains this week. This Week: at Appalachian St., Our Pick: Appy St. 35, Idaho 21

2) Georgia State 1-10. Sigh. Yes, they play here in OSG's hometown. But nobody knows it. For good reason. The poster children for how NOT to become a FCS level team. They'll be a punchline for a very long time. There was hope after an opening week win. But, then...yeah...reality. This Week: vs. Texas St., Our Pick: Texas St 37, Ga. St 17



1) SMU 0-10. Yes ladies and gentlemen, your champs. Sure, they have two games left, but do you really think the Mustangs will win either one? Nah, neither do we. Though they do play UConn to end the season so there's a chance...maybe. This Week: vs. Houston, Our Pick: Houston 47, SMU 10.

And so ends the week in College Football. Championship week is almost upon us...

But until then, we hope you all have a Happy Turkey and all the trimmings...we'll talk again next week.

Enjoy your new music cut of the week:

Ohio Tries to be Funny By Banning M's This Weekend

((ht: sbnation.com))

Apparently, well, at least acc-rding t- a res-lution passed in the state -f "HI" (ohio), every-ne living there is str-ngly enc-uraged not to use the letter "M" when speaking...-r writing this weekend.

Why?

Because it's their bizarre way -f standing behind the -nly University that any-ne in the state -f HI is supposed to -r all-wed t- care about, "HI State".

The G-vern-r of -HI- even Tweeted ab-ut the res-luti-n, taking pride and -wnership of his pr-clamati-n.

And the reas-n f-r this banning -f letters?

This week is their annual rivalry game with "Ichigan".

S-, while we respect traditi-n and understand that pe-ple often d- stupid things when it comes to f--tball rivalries, this -ne -ay be the silliest thing we've ever heard. It even t-ps "HI State cach Urban Eyer" banning media c-vering the team fr-- wearing blue shirts. -ade even m-re ridicul-us earlier this seas-n when he didn't tell any-ne he was d-ing it.

Having a little fun with THE rivalry. To*orrow, Ohio goes without a letter in the alphabet. #Buckeyes pic.twitter.com/eXzLhcS7z9
— John Kasich (@JohnKasich) November 29, 2013

And the reas-n f-r this banning -f letters?

This week is their annual rivalry game with "Ichigan".


N-w, bef-re y-u say we have n- sense -f hu--r, we say t- y-u "read this st-ry....cl-sely. You'll see -ur sense of hu--r has never been better.

The Dirty Dozen and Bottom of the Barrel: Turkey Day Edition

Hi Boys and Girls. We had something come up and couldn't do our regular look at the best and worst of college football...but we're back.

And it's the week of rivalry. The week of the Turkey. The week we all celebrate the fact that we can eat. And that we can eat in excess.

But we digress...

To celebrate the holiday, we pay homage to the greatest Thanksgiving TV Show episode ever produced:



Classic.

So...last week was upset Saturday with two of the three undefeated teams taking it on the chin. And when the dust settled, suddenly we were back where we started.



Anyway. We'd like to say we would have been 14-0 or something last week, but honestly...we wouldn't have been. So instead of dwelling on where we were this season, we'll just turn Casey Kasem and say "On with the Countdown"....

**Note**--We are not beholden to the BCS poll so what you are about to read may not be what . they think the rankings should be. It's what "I" think they should be...and it's my column...


THE DIRTY DOZEN:

1) Alabama 10-1. This will anger Texas A&M and Notre Dame fans, but you all know this is true. Yes, Johnny Football beat them, but if they play 10 times, 'Bama wins at least 8 of them. And to be totally honest, I'm not going to put any money on these guys beating Georgia next week. But I have been known to be wrong. Yes, I can admit that!. (This Week: vs. Auburn. Our Pick: Alabama 41, Auburn 10)

2) Oregon 10-1. Yes, we know they lost to Stanford, but we still believe they are this good. There obviously is a way to beat them and part of that is hope there are injuries. If they were to have made it to the BCS Championship game, they could very well win it because they'll be healthy. (This Week: at Oregon St. Our Pick: Oregon 38, Oregon St. 31)

3) Notre Dame 11-0. Sorry Irish fans, your team is good, but they aren't "That" good. They may survive USC (thanks Matt Barkley) but they aren't better than a 4th place SEC team to be honest. And that alone will get you to the BCS Championship game. (This Week: at USC. Our Pick: Notre Dame 24, USC 21) 

4) Texas A&M 9-2. So...here is your hottest team in College Football. Are they the best team. No, not this year. But I wouldn't want to play them either. Johnny Football may have stolen the Heisman this year and the O-Line on this team is good. Really good. (This Week: vs. Missouri. Our Pick: A&M 41, Mizzou 24) 


5) Georgia 10-1.  On paper, this team should be #1 or #2, but they don't play on paper. Until they win a game like the SEC Championship game, there will always be questions about this team. They haven't won a "Big" game in a long time. The ranking isn't higher because of that and a soft schedule. (This Week: vs. Georgia Tech. Our Pick: Georgia 43, Ga.Tech 21)

6) Florida St. 10-1. One bad loss. Sometimes you never recover from that. And FSU hasn't. This is a good, deep football team that in theory would be tough to beat in a playoff. But we don't have a playoff this year. They are easily the best of the ACC. (This Week: vs. Florida. Our Pick: FSU 24, Florida 10)

 7) Kansas St. 10-1. Kind of hard to explain the loss to Baylor. If they were as good as advertised, should that have ever happened? It also may have ruined Collin Klein's shot at the Heisman. Redemption would come this week, but it won't get them to the BCS title game. (This Week: vs. Texas. Our Pick: K-State 31, Texas 21)

8) LSU 9-2. They've actually gotten better as Zach Mettenberger is beginning to show signs of being an SEC level QB. He wasn't until the Alabama game. However the "D" giving up 35 to Ole Miss is sort of surprising. (This Week: at Arkansas. Our Pick: LSU 34, Arkansas 27)

9) Stanford 9-2. A good win over Oregon. A very good win. But the "D" played the game of their life and Kevin Hogan didn't lose the game. We aren't sure they can do it 2-weeks in a row and they'll need to . (This Week: at UCLA. Our Pick: UCLA 34, Stanford 23)

10) Ohio St. 11-0. This isn't your dad's Ohio State, they are much more rounded. But in any other year, they probably wouldn't be undefeated in the Big 10/14. They are very good team in a very not-so-good this year conference. (This Week: vs. Michigan. Our Pick: Ohio St. 31, Michigan 27)
411) Florida 10-1. Sorry Gator fans, you have the most overrated team on the board. You wouldn't beat any of these teams ahead of you. Your defense and special teams are very good, but your offense is monumentally bad. But take heart, no matter what we say, if you beat FSU and Notre Dame loses, you'll be in the BCS Championship game, whether you deserve it or not. (This Week: see #6)

12) UCLA 9-2. Okay. So. We owe our pal Jim Mora Jr. an apology. He's apparently found some sort of magic track to get a group of someone else's recruits who weren't playing very well to the point where they could win the Pac-12. They won't beat Oregon but they aren't far away. (This Week: See #9)

THE BOTTOM OF THE BARREL:

**UMASS WON! UMASS WON!**
 5) Idaho 1-10. Fear the potato. What else can be said about a team that fired their coach and their starting QB during the season? You are pretty much doomed to suck at that point. We did see a stat that they've lost 10 or more games 3 of the last 5 years. So they technically could be a legacy choice here. (This Week: at Utah St. Our Pick: Utah St. 43, Idaho 17) 

4) New Mexico St. 1-9. What would the worst of the worst be without a New Mexico team? Start off with a win...and then lose 9 straight. Not gonna make for a good holiday out there. (This Week: at BYU. Our Pick: BYU 38, NM State 17)

3) Akron 1-11. So...we can't pick the Zips final game vs. Toledo cause they've already played it. And lost. Well, at least they are already out of our misery. So there is that. Guess they won't be leaving the poll. See ya next year!

2) Colorado 1-11.This is like an EPICALLY bad football team. And yet they escape the basement only because they managed to somehow beat Washington St in week #4. The defense is the WORST in Division 1 football...bar none. And the offense isn't much better. (This Week: vs. Utah. Our Pick: Utah 46, Colorado 16)   

1) Southern Miss. 0-11. Fear not Hattiesburg, it's almost over. Your first losing season in 87 years. Words cannot describe this team, so we'll keep this short. The Ellis Johnson experiment= FAIL. New Coach= BRETT FAVRE! Make that hire...you'll be on ESPN every week. (This Week: at Memphis. Our Pick: --amazingly--Memphis 17, Southern Miss 13)
 
And...in honor of the Holiday...we give you an "All-Time" family favorite----